pam hemmerling

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flop.

The Gift of Failure


There's no bow with this gift. Or ribbon. Or wrapping paper.

But there is a party.

It's name is Pity Party.

Failure is sneaky. It comes wrapped in the beautiful colors of high hopes and big dreams. Then hurls itself at you dagger-like with mean words. Disappointing thoughts. Sharp criticism.

You think I'm being dramatic?

Failure is a big deal.

Failure is powerful. Hard. Embarrassing.

Because failure is a real thing. A legitimate possibility. It limits us. Keeps us from trying. Intimidates. Goads us to stay safe. Remain small. My heart agrees, telling me to avoid anything that undermines my confidence.

But I've learned that failure is also valuable. Beneficial. And most importantly, inevitable.

It has much to teach.

But first I must be willing to listen. Grasp it's nuance. Humbly acknowledge it's lessons.

I must be willing to view failure as not just a flop but also a gift.

A costly gift. Yes.

What if I allowed the pain of failure to help me make changes? Move in a new direction? Or simply push me to persevere? 

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Failure as opportunity?

Sounds like an oxymoron to me.

But what if I believe I can use failure? To learn. Assess. Refocus. Refine. Edit. 

Meaningful instruction is never easy so why should failure be any different?

No, failure isn't a pleasant gift.

Failure isn't a welcome gift.

But it can be a positive gift.

Failure can give you a lifetime of understanding that no amount of success will ever bring.

Have you experienced failure? If so, go ahead and have that pity party. Be angry. Give up. Vent. Grieve.  

I did all that and more.

After the misery I came to a crossroads. The intersection of "no can do" and "press on".

I made my decision.

Grab my hand and let's get back up again.

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